A gift

Today was the big day where I was to sing I heard him come, I was nervous and from last night still a tad I guess the word is unwilling to allow the spirit to guide; even though I wanted him there so bad. When the sacrament came around all I asked was for the spirit to be with me, I didn't care if I messed everything up, I didn't care if my pitch was even on I just wanted to let the emotion guide me. Then I became a tad selfish, this song was for me and my father. My greatest tangible gift he has given me is my ability to express myself through music whether through piano or voice or just music in general I realized that it is a gift. A blessing that I have been given that has the ability to change lives. So in my selfish state I told God this song was just for me and him, I didn't want to sing it for anyone else it was my gratitude to him for this gift. I stood up, took a deep breath turned around and looked at the magnificent view of the whole city behind me nodded to Morgan to start, closed my eyes, and said Lord this one is between you and me, this is for you. Then I began. The peace out weighed my long time friend "my nerves" :) As I began I looked around to each face, one woman on the back row had her face buried within her hankie silent sobs rocked her body, next I looked to the woman in the middle of the chairs tears streaming down her face, then to my fellow students different faces sticking out some looking intently out the window to the city and some looking directly at me. Some wet with tears, others fixated with out a blink. It was then I realized what God actually gave me, the gift he so lovingly bestowed upon me. I was fixed on the two women and a select few of my class mates. Emotion sat deep in my heart but there was nothing that was going to get in the way of what I had to say in that song. I never looked down, the words stayed within my heart and my mind. My mind was clear and nerves working for me and not against. I spoke the words with passion. It was when I finished and had sat down my emotions were let loose, tears streamed down my cheeks and I was for the first time in a very long time content I was at peace with myself and knew I had so much to offer. After sacrament I hate to admit that I ran out the back, I don't sing or play piano or anything like that for words of affirmation from other people, I don't like it very much because I do it for my father and myself. But I had many people who came to me old and young who said that song stirred emotions that had not been touched for years. One woman said she hadn't heard that song since her mission when she would sing it in Spanish, she told me it was a beautiful song in spanish the evoked certain feelings and that she never thought she could feel those feelings come back to her; until I sang. Another one (who had her face covered the whole time) came to me and told me the spirit was so strong, she was Asian so I couldn't understand her very well but my heart knew what her heart wanted to say. Friends came to me and told me it reminded them of home, or of girls camp, times that are cherished in their hearts. I have been given a very special gift; it is the gift of music, it is the gift of passion and emotion it is God's own gift to me something he knew would suit me very well and help not only other people but myself more than anything.